» December 2007
» I am stressed out.
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12/19/2007: "I am stressed out."
Stressed out, duh.
I really want to take a month off. Seriously. I am so stressed out. I really wish someone would just hand me enough money to live off of for a year so I could take some time and learn some stuff, explore some stuff, get some sleep (I have not been sleeping well...again), maybe go back to school, something.
If you want to know why, hit the link for the full entry. If you don't, and I don't really expect you to, just chalk it up to me freaking out because of the holidays and the big artificial deadline of January 1, and move on.
So, here's what's going on. I had a client ask me to stop working on a project today. It wasn't like I got fired or anything. They basically said, "we think you've fulfilled your part of the contract, and we're going to make the rest of these changes ourself, in-house." So, it shouldn't be an issue for me. I have, technically, fulfilled my contract. They've paid me. It's their web site, they can do what they want.
But, it does depress me. I just hate it when this crap happens. I like to see projects through to their completion...and this won't be one that I get to lovingly upload into the world of the internet.
Secondly, I have a lot of irons in the fire right now. My January and February are already booked up. I am preemptively stressed out about my life after the new year.
Thirdly, I am stressed out because of money. I am working harder right now that I ever have before and I am just not making as much as I think all this hard work is worth.
Fuck it. Maybe 2008 will be a better year, but unlike previous years, I don't have that feeling. Instead I have this overwhelming feeling of dread. I predict that at this time next year I will be sitting here stressed out because I am still fat, still working too hard for too little money, still driving a 10 year old car and still wishing I had the time and money to do the things I want.
Replies: 1 Comment
On Thursday, December 20th, Curtiss Grymala said
Welcome to real life, Jon. We all feel that way most of the time. Just wait until you have kids to add to your stress.
I'm sure everything will be fine. Buck up, little camper. With your talents, there is no reason to fret.